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The Trick Is Not Confusing The Anal Lube With The Fiery Jack

Council officials in Manchester have been criticised for spending £8,000 of taxpayers' money on a sex guide for the over-50s.

The illustrated 47-page booklet offers tips for those seeking to spice up their marriage or looking for new love after divorce. It contains tips on how to use a condom, discover your erotic side and combat impotency problems. Critics say that, instead of paying for a sex guide, the council should concentrate on improving routine services such as schools, rubbish collection and public amenities.

Tory MP Ann Widdecombe said: "I think this guide is an incredible waste of money. If someone hasn't learnt how to have sex by the time they have turned 50 then a booklet is certainly not going to help." The booklet is based on information gleaned from focus groups for the over-50s. It includes real-life experiences and information provided by pensioners celebrating their sex lives. One, called Pam, 68, writes: "We're more experienced, more mature and more confident and we're able to talk about what we want which makes us better lovers."

Martin Rathfelder, 57, of patient watchdog Manchester LINK, said he was 'all in favour' of the guide which could teach his generation things they didn't know.  He said: "For some of us the world's changed since we were boys and girls - for example there was no HIV when I was young. It's important there isn't a taboo over this. Some of us do foolish things and might not feel entirely at ease if we're the oldest person in the sexual health clinic."

Good old Anne Widdecombe... never one to let a total lack of knowledge stop her from having an opinion!

Do you fancy tackling the congress of the raging monkey?

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